i think i have reached a jessica simpson level of regret
in spanish class. the girl next to me asked what Galapagos were. i told her they were islands. now she thinks Galapagos means islands in spanish
but there are maragaritas for $3 so that was all i needed to hear
Hiding in the clothes rack at walmart like a 4 year old. Already scared 3 people. New fav weekend activity
there were more penises there than on chat roulette
i only understood the part that said mucho orgasmos
You're just mad at the fact that I want to be a car alarm.
i had to get the starbucks manager to open the bathroom door for me...you passed out on the floor, the things i do for you
she tends to only attract lesbians and homeless men
just letting you know that jen either: wasn't feeling well and ate grass to make herself throw up or threw up because she's stupid and ate grass
Dude, he threw a pool chair off of an 8 story building. It was a successful night I'd say.
Everything is just really out of control. I hear puking from three different parts of the house. Roger has black eye from being punched. Kaiser tried shaving his head, but somehow burned himself. Music is bumping, but everyone is either puking and calling out for help or blacked the fuck out.
As if I didn't already know that I was in the friend zone, our conversation that included the words "kiddo" and "old friend" really was a knee biter.
I bet you there is porn for people who get off on someone rubbing Chipotle on themselves
Seriously, why do I have a mortar round?
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