the bus pole looks like a man who feels guiltyty about something
so that wasnt chicken after all
If you get a breast reduction, you have to let me see them before hand at least once. It's a rule.
His pick-up line from last night: "I bet you cant climb these stairs right now." Needless to say.. it worked.
Please stop sending me picture messages of your shit. Seriously. I don't care if it looks like popcorn chicken.
Tried to steal a keytar from my hook up's house.
no, forget the keg and come see this. prego pants here is dunking chicken nuggets into pudding and crying over a cat show on animal planet.
Saturday evening, however, will be my vodka and bubble wrap extravaganza.
WHY IS IT FROWNED UPON THE DRESS UP IN CAT COSTUMES AND SIT OUTSIDE OF BARS WITH A BOX OF WINE I THOUGHT THIS WAS AMERICA
I'd say it's his fault for never running us through proper protocol for "catching your RA in the middle of him banging some girl"
It was going very smoothly until she noticed my boner of hope.
I'm eating animal crackers on my bed next to my vibrator writing about the hopelessness and depravity of humanity. I am LIVING.
and then you proceeded to throw soup at him for calling you a bitch...a CAN of soup...
IF THE SUNS NOT EVEN OUT THEN WHY IS HIS DICK OUT WTF
I just woke up naked in a bed with your brother. WHAT THE HELL HAPPENED TO NOT LETTING EACH OTHER DO STUPID THINGS?
You fucked my brother?!
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