No it only became awkward when she walked in with her new boyfriend and we realized we'd all banged her
so after morning sex, she rolled a joint and turned on sports center
you might have found the rare bro goddess. i thought they were myth
His sex texting was like a step by step guide to the most boring sex ever...
At McDonald's last night the guy gave you the wrong kind of McFlurry, so you screamed at him, "YOU MCFUCKED UP."
just had to re-breakup with her. it was like shooting a dead horse that was crying and talking.
Under someone's bed. Not sure whose. I think they're sleeping in it.
Found my other fake eyelash. In a condom wrapper...
Then you shook your fists at the sky and explained to us that losing a sneeze is like losing an orgasm
He is dust bro dust in the wind I waited in this unlocked car long enough.
I'm having a really difficult time dealing with the fact that my dog now shares a name with Snooki's crotch-spawn.
my neighbors having band practice on sunday morning is a message from the universe that I should stop drinking
Try explaining "the nature of your relationship" to a cop when your fuck buddy vandalized your car. Priceless.
Is there a polite way to say "Sorry for your head injury but I still want to hook up"?
btw my frat has a search out for you. the "girl who threw up in the middle of the party" but it was on some fat girls. so thank you.
Good to know. If our sexting moves past early 1900s vernacular, I'll be sure to use that once or twice.
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