Until that no good dick sucking whore stays away from my boyfriend I am gonna start blowing all of his friends...
Well for starters i'm drinking vodka out of a bell pepper.
woke up 7 floors down in the lobby...i my underwear. New high or new low?
New experience?
Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
Yeah he is here but I can't let him know I am until he has like 30 min worth of drinks. so when he see me he isn't like "omg ew,NO!"
I have so much to learn from you, wise slut
Packed at 6 am completely wasted. Damage assessment: 12 pairs of socks (no underwear), a flashlight, 3 shorts, shot glass, 8 sweaters, puff paint, one sneaker.
if i found out she had a dick after i got head, does that still make me gay?
Boys can't fool me. I know "want to come up and meet my dogs?" is just a nondirect way of saying "come up and meet my penis".
Just dominated the men's bathroom at work. Sounded like the intro of a death metal song.
If it makes you feel better, I doubt anything could survive in your uterus.
I think he pocket dials me so much because I'm in his phone as 'Air Mattress'
ur not supposed to find someone to make out with when ur bf takes u to his SISTERS house to hang out with her and her husband
Now I can say "look me up on Pornhub."
Chang gave me a 1.5 gallon beer tasting cup, i have a new boyfriend with a huge stick, Members of the Irish Rugby team slapped my ass and cheered for firmness, and a couple of strangers are naming the child after me. Best. Weekend.Ever.
What's the place called?
I searched "county" on google, but....there's a lot of results
Randomize
