I guess she didn't feel like it. There was hair all over it and everything
i wonder what thom yorke's orgasms sound like
Dude its so hot it my room I can't jack off. Its gonna be a long summer.
I thinking of taking all of the pics of his dick that he's sent me and making a calendar.
ok. can u leave the new roommate a list of instructions for me? like what i need to be fed and when i need to be exercised?
Corn dogs constantly. And all.the time
She kept saying how cute and adorable I was. I felt like a care bear getting a blowjob
Let's drink?
Just because it's bacon vodka doesn't mean it's for breakfast.
Climbing out Mr. Friday night's bathroom window. He thinks I'm puking. Be on state st. with the getaway car and if you could bring me a shirt and some advil that'd be dandy.
So proud. See you in five. I've got coffee.
At one point they were sandwiching me, both petting my stomach, mad dogging each other. Then they somehow telepathically decided to both try to pull my pants down. Such nice guys.
Come out Saturday. It's for my lesbian daughter from the future birthday.
the chips you spilled whiskey on is not the same thing as Irish breakfast potatoes
Also, I want you to know, that not only am I apparently the expert on sexting. Our bishop is consulting me later. So my talents are varied.
He got me a cake that said " Congratulations on the dick "
just called AAA to get my keys out of me car and then afterwards realized they were in my pocket...stoner life
Got 3360 Shoppers points for buying Plan B. I guess this all worked out for the best.
Randomize
