New rule: no balls on the kitchen counter.
I think we should see other people.
Already working on it.
so there is either a lot of blood or a lot of wine in the shower....
you realize that if you hadn't mouthed "we're getting laid tonight", i wouldn't have woken up with your ex this morning. just sayin
Let me make this really simple. We woke up this morning and fucked three times. When I got up and took a shower she cleaned up the mess from last night and did the dishes. Then we went out and she bought me brunch. I don't give a FUCK how much you don't like her.
Thanks for alerting everyone in our apartment what your one night stand's name is. Could you scream a little louder?
One of those nights had to have been when we tried to walk through the McDonald's drive through -- and then got in the car with complete strangers. And stole their hamburgers.
Okay. thanks for sacraficing your body and risking aids for our snowcone business.
Why is everyone else growing up when I'm just crying, eating, and having pregnancy scares?
I asked him why he was eating an entire can of refried beans, the only answer I got was "revenge"
If its possible to have a hickey on your nipple, I have one. Thank you.
HE HAS CHALLENGED MY BADNESS. I MUST CONQUER ALL THAT QUESTIONS MY POWER. BRING FORTH THE TIT PICS.
I had to bail out of the tour de Franzia because I have class Saturday morning. Grad school is ruining my life
Are you trying to say I've made an emotionally well rounded transformation similar to the Grinch?
She's just a lonely cunt and i hope she stays that way for the rest of her fucking life.
This seems like an over reaction to someone eating your fries.
Randomize
