i want you now
you need to stop dating girls with the same name as your mother...or stop drinking so much...I don't want to see this
Martha Stewart would most definitely roll a great joint.
Im sure that doesnt mean its ruined... It was your bithday you get a free "im drunk at 7 am" card
I love that my brother has just convinced my dad that smoking a blunt it an "unspoken family tradition"
I could hear them screwing through my bedroom wall again this morning, so I started beat boxing to the tempo.
He is so amazingly handsome. I just wanna fuck every shred of decency out of him.
how bad is she
captain morgan with tits
well, I was going to forgive her anyway but not because shes my best friend and moreso because shes my drug dealer
You were sitting on the filthy kitchen floor eating a packet of grated cheese, and you were crying because you couldn't find any cheese.. I'd say our party was a success.
Either I'm still drunk or the right side of the bed is now the left side.
And then we can spend New Year's Day sprawled across the tiles watching greys anatomy and puking into the bushes over the balcony. It'll be great
I need to stop getting high and watching documentaries. Wanna go to Japan with me and protest the mass genocide of dolphins?
The contents of my fridge consist of alcohol, Nuva ring, and cheesecake. I'm that girl.
They also submitted to my demands for pizza
You are cut off. Your giant penis and crazy awesome sex is ruining my body...
Randomize
