we'll hang out once this whole, "your friends are robbers and drug addicts" thing blows over with my parents.
Stop staring at my boobs, I can't concentrate
Well how do you think I feel
fair enough
I got cut off for calling the flower girl a slut. What are you doing?
While we were having sex he told me "this is what you get for not parking my car right" I have never drove his car. He was that kind of weird.
the wall and i were having dominance issues.
He's a cat fanatic .. That was not in the fine print when we started fucking
People were running around punching out the ceiling tiles Super Mario style.
I can't believe I ever hated her sister or friends. They got her some sexy sexy ass lingerie for the honeymoon. I think I love them bitches
I heard you coughing. Are you choking or smoking? And are you okay?
Even his sexts are poetic. He said breasts instead of tits so I'm gonna lock this shit down asap
I just tried to snap you a picture of the CVS where we decided not to become parents.
I was so drunk I asked my mom if she had always been my mom or if it was someone else for a while
I'm completely creeped out. He's dressed as me. And thinks it's funny.
Omfg I just White Claw shamed a Girl Scout Cookie mom and I feel SO BAD.
The same idiot-bubble, now just bigger and louder.
Randomize
