If its called oral, why is it so hard to talk?
After you pregamed and were plastered you saw the cop was parked illegally so you gave him a citizens arrest
i feel like his penis is a security blanet. i cant fall asleep unless its in my hand
I'm going to leave the fate of whether I go to my midterms up to my dealer hitting me up or not
If this outfit doesn't get me pregnant tonight I don't know what will...
Challenge: Try to have your balls hanging out in every picture you take tonight
Challenge Accepted
I'm always drunk lately
Now I'm in a game of hide and seek in Sears
I'm at the point where I'm more upset that he got to keep my bottle of Fireball than that he stopped talking to me with no explanation
If by some world ending natural disaster I get into an actual relationship with this kid, should I tell him the truth about the web of lies I've based our current relationship on?
Are there rules against fucking your ex's dealer?
Like your dick isn't Beyoncé, it doesn't get close ups
Fucking suck it up and drink your feelings like a normal human being.
There's lube on my homework. #priorities
I'll be an awkward "I've had the grooms penis in my mouth" presence and we can party our nipples off.
I'm sorry I walked in on you guys, but all I heard from outside was her screaming "Dive, dive!". Sex was my last guess for what was going on in there.
Randomize
