I skipped work to stalk him.
I just encouraged Kelsey to make out with some guy for beer so I could take one, does this make me a pimp?
By definition I think it does.
So this is what it feels like to be all that is man.
If I were a hot girl. I'd whore around, I'd be awesome.
Her name starts with A and ends with whore.
The nice sales man at 711 gave me a handful of free lighters for buying a carton of cigarettes. I guess the depressed damsel in distress look works for me.
I have taken lazynest to a new level. I took a picture of the notes on the board instead of writing them. I win.
I really super glued a paper bow tie to my body last night. I need to do less drugs.
he said he needs a little more pabst, some time to jack off and a sandwich and he'll be ready
I awoke this morning alone and naked in my bed I forecast my date later not going so well because I have three giant hickies on my neck there is a note next to my bed that looks a 3rd grader wrote it on my college acceptance letter
I'm making a quesadilla and including it in the picture because that's the only way I think I can send her dick pics.
At least I remembered to wear a bra. I feel like that's a big accomplishment right now
i just got hit on on the bus. Yes sir, because its every boys dream to fuck a forty year old with a face tattoo
I forgot her safe word. It was a rough night.
She tied me to her bed using her honor chords. Thank god for graduation!
What's the blow job-backrub exchange rate these days? I've got some killer stress knots
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