So I pulled my t-shirt down, pushed my boobs up and marched right into that church!
question: masturbation: how much is too much? I think i'm about to tip toe a fine line
Speaking of morons, I just found half a Subway sandwich in the bathroom drawer You or your brother?
the fda needs to get their shit together cause these four loko going away parties are gonna kill me
he told me my vagina was like a beautiful piece of salami
I think I just asked the Greek gyro guy on a yoga date.
NEW INFORMATION meech found me passed out on a bench outside.
There was blow residue on my chem book and my TA was like, did u stain your notebook with CaCO3?
things I never thought I would say vol. 24 "Bagpipes just remind me that my relationship is over"
I totally almost forgot you fucked that guy. St. Patty's bar crawls always have a drawback.
I got inside last night via doggy door
When i said i was brazilian i swear to god he started to tear up
Look, all I'm looking for is a good time and someone whose chest I can bury my face in
We were supposed fuck one time, but ended up fucking for 2 years.
Listen, I've got balls in my face can I call you back
He fucked me for my Netflix login, I fucked him for his HBO login, and actually I think that's beautiful
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