Desperate + desperate does not equal a fun night.
Well i then put my mattress in my closet and am currently on it. This is a new one.
I can't make this stuff up. Your ex is singing I Will Survive on the karaoke.
Just woke up. Need to shower and fuck. Be there when I'm done disappointing. Should be 30.
She insisted on fucking on the futon mattress on the floor, answered the phone call from her boyfriend who was on his way to pick her up, and then had the audacity to ask if I was clean
Everything sucks i just wanna cry and smoke a bowl and pet my cat and die. All at the same time
So burnt out. Like weed hangover. And someone just fell through the ceiling outside of my class. How's your morning going?
Really? I thought your parents stopped loving you when you drunkenly fell through the ceiling...
Not only does DQ have s'mores shakes, sonic has a hot dog in a pretzel bun, and Wendy's has a burger in a pretzel bun. Important things are happening.
Holy fuck where did this cat tattoo on my ass come from
A huge penis doesn't warm the soul. Or that's what I've had to tell myself.
It's days like today, when my bra and underwear match, that make me feel like I'm getting my life together...
i tried to break up pigeon sex because one looked too young to consent. fireball feminism ftw
I'm like, not good at living.
I don't think you understand I turned down McDonalds for you.
Randomize
