i was so high last night that i actually googled "how to get un high"
if you ask that question again our friendship is over
i dont care about people's attitudes as long as they give me head
a guy from my religion class just walked in with a red cup. hello first friday of 2nd semester.
I'm drinking whiskey outta the bottle trying to earn the trust of some ducks in the yard
you blew your rape whistle in his face every time he got near a girl till he left the party...
scratched cornea got me an eyepatch and a blowjob from a girl with a thing for pirates
Based on the pics I have taken of hookups while they were passed out or sleeping, I have scientifically concluded that no two vagina lips are the same. They are like snowflakes.
My mouth tastes like what I imagine a hobo's skin would taste like.
I'm getting turned down for sex. Apparently my "sexual appetite" cannot be satiated even by a man who's such a deviant he went to prison for jerking off in his car.
she keeps dunkaroos and gatorade in her bed. yep pretty sure im in love.
Honestly and this might sound scary... But I want to get high and play with weapons
I just saw the co founder of Waffle House passed away Friday. Are you okay?
That's about the same time my life started falling apart... Coincidence?!?!? I think NOT!!!
Her name was Danica but I felt like it would be hard to say drunk so I called her Shelby
Looks like it rained condoms in my room last night
I'm pretty sure I smell like alcoholism and shame. And it's not a pretty scent.
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