guess you're going to miss out on a groin massage and a frosty vagina
It would be celebrated in history as "the orgasm heard round the world"
So far we've hooked up on a pool table, on a public bathroom counter and now in a little league baseball dugout. We haven't even made to a house yet.
Sober me does NOT approve of what went on in my pants last night.
The carpet cleaning people refuse to steam clean human feces. I'll call back later and blame it on the dog not you
I might lose an organ but I've got booze. I'll be fine.
It got quiet and we all stood around and opened the box and I've never seen so many burritos in my life man. it was fucking biblical.
How do you clean puke off a stuffed bear?
WHY DID YOU NOT OFFER TO LET HIM STAY
Dude, it's like you want him inside me more than i do
I made an executive decision to rename my Resume file to something other than MONEYMONEYMONEY.
He asked if I was alright. I said "Yeah, I'm just an incapacitated ball of orgasmic bliss right now."
Sorry I blacked out in bed
it was real late and you were brushing your teeth with miller light. it was bound to happen.
We left him in some bushes a few blocks down toward campus. Did he find his way home?
Obviously you're feeling a little sexually frustrated.
I consider humping a stranger every ten minutes when I walk in the street.
I'm going to get him a gold star sticker and put it on his dick
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