Yep Great. Apparently I didn't just say things once that night. Drink. Yell. Repeat.
U also mentioned u werent wearing any underwear hahahaha
For a day that started with shitting my pants, things turned out fairly well.
Just finished my law exam. Questions 4-18 seemed to pertain specifically to things we've done this semester.
we were both as far on opposite edges of my bed as possible this morning. id say work is gonna be a little uncomfortable from now on
I don't think eating half of a pickle out of my mouth counts as getting to know me
She literally pulled the door off the hinges and "dropped" it down the stairs... Do I just say 'good job' and put her to sleep?
Post walk of shame: realized the underwear I put on when I left was another girl's underwear.... woof
No he's great. He's trying to do "sexy stuff" for me now, which is pretty hilarious. He stirred my daiquiri with his penis last night. He also tied a bouquet of flowers around it.
Maybe don't sell him so much adderall next time. The other day during finals he was convinced that he could see the "molecules of life in the air" and kept reaching up slowly to grab them.
Then I did coke with my taxi driver where he then ended up paying me for the drive. You should try being a girl sometime it's super sick.
I need to you to send me drugs via FedEx
I just woke up in the closet wearing nothing but a Santa hat.
I got a lap dance last night from a girl while I was wearing a Captian America onsie. My life does not suck.
I'm making a will, in it I'm leaving you my skull.
You've had it in your mouth, how have you not seen it?
Randomize