I just went through her cupboards. Eye patch and sword. nowhere near each other. different shelfs.
next person that tells me Facebook is a professional tool is getting kicked in the teeth.
Today a TA in one of my classes told me he thought I was 35 and going back to school as an adult learner. Alcohol is working me.
Their wedding is on my 21st birthday. I fail to see a way that this could end poorly.
I just made Jack Daniels snow cones.
How do I tactfully ask if the neighbors downstairs can hear me beating it?
Apparently having him hold an open book in front of me while i'm blowing him doesn't count as studying...
My friend just ordered a beer and poured it on the floor in celebration of open bar night
so, does the "dick the size of your forearm" thing run in the family then?
you know it's gonna be a good 4/20 when you start saving up for it in january.
Did I run away from you last night?
Yeah it was a great moment for our friendship
Since Josh is going to be Carl Sagan for Halloween, he bought a turtleneck and sportsman jacket. It's all my nerd fantasies come true.
You had me at "let me see your balls"
You're doing screenings before you set me up again- no child sized dicks allowed.
gonna stay in tonight
and im a platypus. shotgun a beer and get your dick to this party. ive got some hot friends visiting
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