I forgot i ate a salad for dinner, so while i was barfing in his toilet, i kept screaming "i ate leaves?? i cant believe you let me eat leaves!"
Yeah..And after he fingered me, he wiped it on my face and laughed.
ew wtf
Chris' response to jim throwing up was taking off his shirt and saying WHO WANTS A BONER
it was all downhill after the free blackjack taco
im sober playing flip cup. its like cheating.
Question: does the slut gene come from the mother or the father? im trying to figure out who to blame.
I was an emotional waste case that night. She made me stroke her ponytail.
ATTENTION ALL CONTESTANTS OF SLUTFEST 2012 ; not only will we be judging on how many penis you have sucked but also girth and length will be calculated. If you are found lying you will be disqualified. Remember your fellow participants will be rendering the same services to probably the same people. So choose wisely and let the games begin!
I owe you a thank you for last night. Only you could go up to a guy, ask if he likes my boobs, and return later to find us in a full on dance floor makeout sesh. Well played.
He put his hand in my cleavage. NOT ON. IN. BETWEEN. NO more gingers
I'm on the toilet with no toilet paper. When are you coming over? I'm contemplating on just staying here until you arrive.
Whoever labeled dysfunctional a bad thing obviously never saw this frinedship coming.
He was gunna drive a half hour for a makeout sesh. Time to take the diapers off and learn about the wonders of the penis, dude
Just woke up next to a hungry lesbian and a half eaten croissant on my stomach. Can you come get me?
I had to pee so bad that I snuck into the bathroom while they were in the shower. At her request, he was massaging her boobs so they could grow faster. Also there was a laser light machine.
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