Skipped a towel and decided to spit the cum into his face. I now owe him new contacts.
im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
her facebook pictures are like a timeline of all the guys she's screwed.
We were both halfway out the window trying to give each other high fives over the roof while the dude was going 150.
running the faucet water is not hiding the sound of you vomiting. fyi.
I think I just saw my 8th grade band teacher trying to pick up a hooker
iphones do not disturb setting is the biggest cock block to my 3am booty calls
Apparently "dick me" was not the response he was looking for.
We peed together in a dark alley while holding hands. That is a bond that can never be broken.
Monday afternoon and I'm still hungover from Valentine's Day. I think I'm winning at the single life.
all his sexual metaphors involve condiments, should I worry?
His dick is the size of my forearm. Would it be rude to ask to take a comparison photo after sex?
I AM BEING ACCOSTED BY A HUMMING BIRD
I AM IN MILD DISTRESS
my lips are numb and my face feels like a pool. PENGUINSSSSSS
Share, now.
Did you guys just have three hour sex? You both stopped and restarted texting me at the same time
If I were to say yes, would we still be friends?
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