She walked into class late sat down for 5 min muttered 'oh i cant do this' and walked out. She looked like death.
We should party with her soon
my debit card account is gonna say movie, movie, ice cream, movie, cheese fries, get a fucking life, movie
dude uncooked spaghetti noodles dipped in thousand island dressing is better than it sounds
Last comment. I know of no exercises, diets or practices out there to help keeping balls young and healthy. They simply succumb to gravity.
Aparently i was the only guy at her parents bbq throwing up in the pool so Im the asshole right...
Ok now a guy in a winnie the pooh costume is grinding on some chick to the song shots
It's sitting in bleach right now. You will be the creepiest coolest dude in my book if you made a bracelet from my tooth.
Hey, I'm renting a storage locker for the summer to keep all my bondage shit in so my parents don't see it. You wanna split on it for your all your weed shit?
Last night you made me help you pick the raisins out of a kashi bar and acted like it was the most important thing to ever happen to you or our friendship
The guy at the rodeo just told me "if ya don't say none, ya don't get none". What the hell does that mean?
Im pretty sure you just got hit on by a gay cowboy.....
I learned a very valuable lesson tonight...don't touch a cops tazer
Man I gotta stop stashing shit when I'm high. I just spent 2 hours searching for my bag of pot and eventually found it in fucking a bandaid box.
I dont know who to turn my two weeks notice into so I'm just going to get hammered at work and see who fires me.
We couldn't find her anywhere. Finally, I saw her sitting in my bathroom floor spraying hair mouse into her mouth and whispering "I fucking love whipped cream." WHAT DID YOU GIVE HER AND CAN I HAVE SOME?
So, is Canada considered an excessive distance to go for a booty call? Asking for a friend...
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