She took her shirt off and was broader than Dwight Howard.
my bf wants us to fuck our way into the new year.. how original..
I wish I could just thrust my cock straight into her new relationship.
do you know how hard it is to pee with a pumpkin in the toilet ?
I woke up exactly where I passed out... on top of him yet he somehow put his pants back on
Chasing tequila with honey. Ill let you know how it turns out.
Well it was 11am and we were walking to the market with red cups in our hands yelling NO JUDGEMENT at every car that passed
The more I stare at her and block out what she's actually saying with thoughts of what she could be saying, the more interested I become
i woke up the next morning in a pool of blood in my bathroom and a pinata donkeys head in my bed
so much for an anticlimactic 22nd birthday
I still have his teeth marks on the base of my penis. You didnt miss much
Don't underestimate her when she starts going by "the vodka queen"
The problem with that is that my car has been stolen
Lets just say my thoughts when getting dressed this morning was "vagina friendly" options
When are you getting back?
Well google maps doesn't have an estimated time for crawling... Could be days
ALL I WANT IN MY MOUTH IS A GLORIOUS COCK SMOTHERED IN CHOCOLATE. DICK AND CHOCOLATE; IS IT TOO MUCH FOR A GIRL TO ASK FOR?!
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