he's afraid if he sleeps with me i'll go all lavender brown on him
im learning from these one night stands last time i came in her this time i came on her AND deleted every contact in her phone!
Jizz is so healthy, they should sell it at Jamba Juice. Call it "Jamba's Juice". Genius.
Btw, I'm creating an event on fb to celebrate the one yr anniversary since we went to jail.
Is it bad that my only regret is fucking on the bathroom floor and not the sink?
It's all fun and games until some random starts jerking it on the deck.
'twas the night before moms weekend and all were blacked out. Not a coug was sober not even farm house. I was down to fuck but you were not in sight, so I bid pullmania a sweet goodnight.
I walked around with red solo cups on my feet, weeds tied around my neck and a tree in my hand
He drunkenly stumbled over to me and told me my "crotch looks spectacular tonight"..... i think this could work
It was like in the Christmas carol when the guy pulls his robe back and 2 small children appear... except this time it was a massive scrotum
I feel like my body was put in a dryer with rocks set on permanent press.
Alas, I cannot find a male suitor sharing my affinity for sport culture who will both manhandle me and treat me with the respect a young Hillary supporter wants and deserves
So is seeing the guy's penis that I'm talking to something you're into or nah?
I just went to cvs and bought condoms, handcuffs and a coloring book
i'd like to schedule a penis for 4pm please.
Randomize
