we drove through mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu. We told the workers that were making Super Size Me 2, drove away without paying and told them to bill our producer.
Responsibility does not care about your dick.
remind me in the morning to get the random kid out of the closet and to clean the pudding off the wall
6 other girls and I took an ice cream truck to the bar when we couldn't get a cab. Best birthday ever.
dude, I'm passing out in the fifth floor janitors closet. Let me know when the rooms opened back up
Don't do anything you wouldn't want to explain to paramedics
But that's half the fun of it
I'm naked and wearing a cowbell.i love med school.
How do I tell a friend I drunkenly broke into his house and may have lost his dog
I told my doctor about us having twin chlamydia
Well I just found the most comfortable way to pass out on my toilet if I ever have to.
Its a good thing to know for upcoming events.
I tripped while walking across the stage and while trying to pick my diploma back up my flask fell out in front of the dean
We smoked a huge blunt and then laid in bed naked eating strawberry shortcake good humor bars. We have the perfect relationship.
He's been pretending to be gay for 3 months in order to get free weed.
And since we used to fuck you are absolutely obligated to like my tweets
it was the most awkward makeout ever. it was record breaking really
...i feel like you have a lot of those.
Randomize
