At least we lost an hour tonight! Less time to make a fool of myself
uhhh i just had a guy tell me he's seen more jam bands and done more drugs than i could err imagine. what a turn on.
i wanna stay in my bed and fart for a few more hours
Balls are like the throw pillows of the penis
not sure how we got back down, broken rib says we didn't use stairs
My friend and I just coined a new term. OBJ. The obligatory blow job. You totally know what I'm talking about.
Like if he goes down on you first, or you just don't want to bone him yet. OBJ.
traded hat for shot of whiskey. lovah yo life. only ADVENTURE NOW. OH GOD IT WENT TO CAPS LOCK
Aaaand my life has been reduced to whether I can reach to flush my puke down the toilet using my foot. The answer is yes.
At some point, it turned less into sparring and more into tough guy dry humping.
He wouldn't let me leave his house until he made me orgasm once for every year I've been alive. The birthday sex song did not prepare me for this.
I don't remember anything after falling in the ditch, but I now have confirmation that my rib is broken. Never drinking again.
I made a nest in his bed. I'm not leaving
He flew in from NY last night. We had sex in the back of my car in the airport parking lot and then he fed me fresh Babka (from Breads Bakery) as I drove him home. I can't decide if I love him or Babka more.
I apparently lifted the young child over my head yelling "Victory!" after that last game of pool, right before doing some Girls Just Wanna Have Fun karaoke.
You spent twenty minutes waxing poetic about her ass and her thighs
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