I'm sorry, but there's just something about mesh over nipples that irks me.
That guy youre talking to looks like Brian from Family Guy.
I was in the bathroom and heard my brother scream "YOU FAIL!!!", and I swear to GOD, I thought my penis was yelling at me.
My gyno told me the birth control she prescribed reduces sex drive
wats the point then?
She was giving me great head...... until I asked her how much this was going to cost.... she left abruptly
Missed another period
I almost hope you're pregnant, this is unfair.
My vagina is depressed thinking about her future.
I love you. Thanks for all the blowjobs.
Im dating a 38 year old who's lap I can fit in. Tell me I don't have daddy issues.
the remote is under the fat chick passed out on the couch. Good luck .. and may god have mercy on your soul.
Annnnddddd this chick is using a hand puppet made of a sock to give her research presentation...
He's bought his dick a cell phone. A cell phone. For his dick...
He gave me the number and told me that I if I want to hook up again, I have to call his penis.
You ruined a cute cat because your lack of horniness
Lost my pants last night. Really need to stop taking shots of whiskey like I'm eating skittles.
I TAUGHT HER CAT TO SIT. CATS DON'T FUCKING SIT ON COMMAND. BUT THIS ONE DID!
It's basically my crowning achievement.
Randomize
