Apparently they shut down a cook out cause people were selling drugsout the drive thru. Nice to be home
I think I have a pornographic memory.
Don't you mean photographic?
No.
I think I should have my paycheck direct deposited to the bar
Just saw a british exchange student take a flyer for free dental care. Yes.
apparently the dude across the street has been dead for like a month. now I feel bad about pissing on his lawn
I really hope he dies in a tragic kegstand mishap
In your drunken brilliance did you make bagel with what appears to be mac and cheese smeared on top and pink icing dip? Because if so it is sitting on the counter
Is it ironic that the girl with the horse face is also on the equestrian team?
explain the broken jalepenos in my underwear drawer?
That's the international "my vagina is unoccupied, come talk to us" chant. You have your mission. Go.
i would rather have had this happen at a time when i wasnt tripping out on shrooms
Like he held up the condom afterwards, twirled it with his finger, and said "look at that load"
I just want an early 40-something dude who is vaguely unencumbered, professionally driven and wants to put me in a ball gag.
I just had all of the sex. All of it.
soo... how was my night?
Randomize
