I dont shave on purpose to keep myself from being slutastic!! it usually works
I told my girl, that I use to jerk off to Star Trek. All she says is, "Oh my gawd, you're such a trekie!". If I was her, I'd be weirded out more than me being a Trek Fan.
she makes me feel like im THAT guy in the taylor swift song
I lost count after the 4th body shot but I think I'm wearing at least 3 different peoples clothes.
Tried to bribe the bartender with wedding cake. Felt bad for not giving her a tip.
just tried to puke while my RA was trying to puke in the stall next to me.bonded for life
So "Abstinence August" was a bust. Maybe I'll try for "Sex-free September" or "Only if we're facebook official October"
Oh you're gonna love this story. I almost cut off a little girl's pony tail.
In his defense he just bought a bong like a week ago so he's still in that honeymoon phase.
I just came inside of a Gatorade bottle. That hungover.
I threw up in the kitchen on the floor and a guy tried cleaning it up with a spoon at a party.
Who has the safety vest from this past weekend Additionally, who has the dancemaster glove?
The way I kissed her was actually pretty charming and then it devolved to car sex
As a member of the kink community, I feel grossly misrepresented
Let’s not dwell on the negatives. I have a fat ass and suck dick well.
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