Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
It started as a joke and ended with a trip to the emergency room, a broken macbook and a gigantic hole in the concrete of my driveway.
He just kept petting my ear and informing me that I wasn't one of the guys
Due to the events of st patties day last year I created a moral and ethical policy so that I won't get kicked out of the bar again. It mostly consists of not wearing pants so then I don't take them off at the bar.. and subsequently get kicked out.
Do I not have a Brazilian bc of my boyfriend situation or do I not have a boyfriend bc of my brazilian situation?
There's jello in my purse I have a mysterious glow stick and didn't sleep with anyone my god I'm 3 for 3 tonight
One of the art pieces was basically this chick throwing raw meat at the audience, anyone who got hit (which I did) got a free shot of whiskey. It was worth it.
drunk in woodshop so don't even say "I SAWWW THIS COMING." I know you're thinking it.
And I wasn't prepared because its been a very long and lonely season and I wasn't expecting to find dick at Press Box trivia night....
We cuddled after till the morning. Then he woke up sober... and straight.
in a meeting in my bathtub while predrinkin for tonight. technology.
Tomorrow night, I am putting you In my trunk. No excuses we have waited forever for this.
My boss and I ended up at the same strip club. We both got lap dances while talking about work.
So today was the first day i've been sober since Wednesday according to my roommate!
We finally gave up searching because everything had started to look like flip flops
Randomize
