thus making me awesome and them whores
Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
Ask her if said friend is decent looking or a wildabeast. Need to know if I need to top these 8 coronas off with a little tequila.
I've reached the slutty point of no return. And it feels like multiple orgasms and coke lines
I don't even know. I woke up in the bathtub with no shirt, covered in towels holding what appeared to be vanillia pudding mixed with captain morgan.
Good news! I don't have Hep C! Better news! I still hate you!
Get you some cowboy.
In that sentence you are the cowboy. That is not saying you should get a cowboy for yourself.
sorry like um she made me hold her puke bag while she peed in front of me is that better
You called my nipples compassionate. What does that even mean?
If you sleep with another manager before the year is up you'll deserve an accomplishment sticker.
I couldn't find the oven mitts so I used a thick stack of tortillas
YOU LEFT MY FUCKING BRA OUTSIDE OF YOUR HOUSE AND NEVER TEXTED ME.
Apparently stoned me thought eating chips in the shower was a good idea.
That is priceless. You walk into her house, fuck her husband and demand Chinese food. Your an inspiration to us all.
How did the surgery go?
My face feels like a marshmallow.
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