I just looked at my iPhone gps history... "the gas station", "the park with a big scary fence", "the trampoline", and, my favorite, "where we were when we were about to do lines off a bible".
As far as figuring life out your talking to a guy that's alternating text messages between his baby mama and a drunk bitch I met tailgating. My best advice is don't worry about shit out of your control and always and I really mean ALWAYS wear a condom.
He is now tagging himself in my pics from last year where he is barely visable in the corner. i feel like he's marking his territory.
Being thankful with your family is one thing. Being thankful with your friends while getting drunk and smoking bowls while eating leftovers, priceless.
let's just skip the pleasantries and go back to my place for pizza and casual sex
Mike is so stoned. I just heard him quietly mutter to himself "rock a piss" as he walked down the hall to the bathroom
I've discovered that regular handcuff keys, sadly, do not work on real police handcuffs.
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
Just found the last picture of me as a virgin. Framed it.
If it meant we had chicks like that every weekend I would gay marry the shit out of you dude
The guys in the quick check just recognized me as the girl who bought rolling papers and whipped cream. This is the walk of shame on crack.
Had a dream I dropped the L word and immediately threatened to kill myself
You probably shouldn't be having nightmares about expressing affection
Listening to sad Lana Del Rey songs together is an integral part of the lesbian bonding process
But actually he solved 40% of my life problems just in one dicking
She demanded to see my stimulus package, I had to go over.
Randomize
