apparently when i got back to tyler's i layed face down on the bed and yelled "don't hurt my asshole!"
Alli causes anal leakage. You can find someone to like you if you are fat but no one will like you if you poop yourself.
never. drinking. again.
lets not get ahead of ourselves.
His parents had a bottle of captain morgan on the table for me when I went for dinner. I feel accepted
I just bedazzled my weight watchers points calculator. You can tell I'm gay.
the only evidence i have from this weekend existing is a title page for a novel i tried writing called "the oyster who gave up drinking"
he walkred up to the manager at dennys and said 'look, my friends passed out in your bathroom, can i go get her?'
the night ended with taco bell and tears
I didn't punch him it was just love coming out of my fist
By early evening I was shouting at the deeply Christian girl to suck my dick inbetween snorting lines of gatorade powder.
Sent him a snap chat of him eating me out so he can relive the moment.
the girl whose rug I peed on is here
I need to reevaluate my stance on weekday hangovers...
It was a recodring of you having sex ! It was like an ape and a dying mongoose at a buffet Xoxoxo
I'll explain later but I just had to legally commit to abstinence for the next 4 months
Randomize
