it's all just a bunch of faces and i remember what the floor looked like.
i'm gonna need a rally to restore sobriety after this weekend...
Drinking with a woman who gave an anti-drugs speech at my high school. Somehow, not surprised.
they night at the roxbarryed us. came out of nowhere,bought us shots, and then the big one licked my hand? we got out of that noise.
Im sitting on the exxon bathroom floor, idk if its healthy but it sure is cold
Yea you just drank all the Hookah water, then started talking gibberish about the Kool Aid you just drank.
Hah no, But it might feel like water boarding to my soul
She's cute, but batshit. Like some kind of dominatrix disney princess.
He thought my hair would soak it up. I HAD TO CUT IT OFF.
I know, I know. But we've discussed my friends and appropriate social behaviour, and I'm pretty sure topless karaoke was a no-no.
At Walgreens. I'm getting condoms and a bottle of water so that I'm not "just getting condoms". I don't think I'm fooling anyone though.
I just fell in love with a beard, the guy it's attached to isn't great but I think I'm going to take one for the team
WHAT A DUMBASS ugh I'm so glad he looks like a middle aged dad now
Harry Potter pub crawl tonight. You know you're living your life right when your check list for the evening is wizard robes, wand and acid.
That's because I've spent the past 21 years convincing my parents the only emotions I have are sarcasm and bitterness.
Randomize
