So #1 way to come back last night and #2 wishbone and I broke into his house and i opened joey's door and u were both passed out and pantless.
even my farts smell like vagina
If they made snuggies with a sleeve for my morning wood, id consider buying one...
The cab driver just finished telling me how leaving community college after one month was the best desicion he ever made.
At chipotle, there's a bachelorette party starting out the night here, i'm going to let you imagine what the bride to be looks like
I just withdrew $200 in ones. I think the teller knew what was up
my dad just referred to me and my boobs as 'the three of you'
Just found my shirt from Saturday, got an automatic contact buzz.
and then you started talkingabout how you wish birth control was disspensed as a candy necklace
and PS, please don't fuck in the corn maze, k?
I'm wearing red that night.
Noted, what shade?
Whore.
Your argument isn't valid... just because I test the waters doesn't make me gay. Makes me versatile. And who doesn't love that!
well what the fuck is the POINT of teetotal mardi gras
I'll send you pictures of my nipples so you don't feel left out.
He broke through his window then signed his name on the biggest peice of glass from it. I think they framed it and named it 'best party ever'
Randomize
