I need help removing her.
going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
the best part is my dad got arrested for the same thing at the same bar 30 years ago... so he cant be mad
i feel like an archaelogyst. im pulling apart last weeks brownies to find the weed in them
You wouldnt be able to explain the can of green beans in my mailbox, would you?
I mean really it's like when you're super hungry and you can't decide what to eat, you just know you want food. This is that situation, but for my vagina
He recognized me by my ass from about 15 yards away. I must have a REALLY nice ass.
I just wish I could congratulate your tits on how much I love seeing them
You are a finance major, can I use my 529 account for your bail?
Its like he woke the dragon, and the dragon is hungry for a good dick.
you stuck pieces of bread to your face with peanut butter and asked if it looked like you had a facial yeast infection.
ohhhh that's why they asked me to leave...
I totally intended to come to the hotel, but I woke up in a parking lot
The struggle is real.
Did I send you a naked snap the other day with a fat blunt in my mouth with the caption "$1200 bitches!" ?
I feel like sleeping with foreign people is a long term investment. It's like a time share. Now when I go to London I have a place to stay.
I don’t have enough daddy issues for this shit, make him go away
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