You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
i have to start hiding my credit card when i drink i woke up this morning with 4 emails from Farmville telling me i spent over $800 on coins last night
On a list of weird places to get a bj, how weird is in the basement of a pharmacy
Would it help you get over me if I told you that I had unprotected sex last night?
stuck in the elevator with that hot guy from the 3rd flood. Worried he can smell my spray tan and desperation
we had a ceremony where you passed your fake id onto me in the middle of the bar. i was on my knees and you presented it to me. i don't think the bartenders were suspicious though
Well call me tomorrow, it's a great story that may lead to me being fired and/or possibly being buried in a shallow grave somewhere out in wine country.
While I was fucking him, he grabbed a taco off his shelf and started eating it. I had taco dripped on me. I have no idea where the taco came from.
It's like a squid of pain has attached to my head and it spreading it's whorey tentacles all over.
He pissed on a police station. Then expected to not be arrested. Sounds accurate.
I can't. I drank 10 years off my life last night. I need to reevaluate. Sorry.
2 reasons we need to wear those onesies to the bar more ofter 1) comfy as shit 2) we both still got laid\n\nHow can you resist that kinda night?
Walk of shaming into my apartment. No one to clap me in. Come home!
All you need is a handful of lube and an open mind
He fucked me so hard my contacts fell out! Didnt know that was possible.
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