Getting fucked up met up rando with a girl I confesswed my love for last night. weird, going with it
So I heard you only slept with me because you were drunk...is that true?
That depends on who this is.
iPhone photo doodle is awesome. I gave my vagina some lazers and sent it to him. He has a whole series waiting on his phone for when he gets off the plane.
Her parties are sponsored by Valtrex. This might not be your best idea.
I woke up to him eating me out, listening to classical music.
I have three paper towels stuck up my vagina. This is not a time to be calm.
i was laying in her brothers bed, in his old room. and i kept getting the chills. i didn't know if it was a draft or the ghosts of BJ's past.
Yeah just got a blowjob at busch stadium during the cardinals game childhood dream realized
Btw, do you want me to fix this with a box of wine and a chick flick or is this more of a 'lets head to the strip club' problem? I'm just trying to analyze the emotional depth of the situation.
I'M WORRY THAT MY VAGINA WILL NEVER KNOW THE TOUCH OF A MAN AND YOU ARE MAKING A MIXTAPE
we all thought you were asleep. he found you an hour later sitting outside in the snow lighting a bowl, singing the CatDog theme song, and hugging a box a Franzia.
"She's seriously grinding on him while whispering into his ear, 'take me to McDonald's.'"
My mom and sister were over. When my drunk roommate came home, he yelled "GOT BITCHES IN MY CONDO"
not that im pissed, but why are there two naked chicks in my bed?
My goal tonight is to be arrested by the Police Women of Cincinnati.
Randomize
