Andrew is trying to convince me that i took your virginity. Please tell me he is lying.
define virginity.
I'll just wear something slutty to the liquor store and hope for the best
that's your solution for everything
I just had to ask my dad for money to pay for my birth control. I've hit financial rock bottom.
Dontating $10 to the Red Cross relief effort in Japan for every car bomb I take tomorrow. Yes, buying me a drink just became a good cause.
Drinking with a woman who gave an anti-drugs speech at my high school. Somehow, not surprised.
I cant do that to my vagina yet. its my prize posession.
He's only a freshman and he needs to expirence shit like that..
YOU would be the Freshman Expirence
i think we should start 2012 by becoming clean and sober for awhile and buckle down
ppsyche im wasted where are you
WHY DIDN'T YOU INVITE ME TO RUN THROUGH TACO BELL'S SPRINKLERS AT 4AM?!
As soon as he came we went to Dairy Queen. That drive through lady was very condescending about our "just fucked" ice cream.
Also, did you really start discussing the weather in the middle of telling you my sexual fantasy about you?
YOU HAVE TO STOP TELLING BARTENDERS WE DON'T HAVE MORAL STANDARDS
Don't come back. They don't have pants.
Oh god.
God has nothing to do with this.
Socially acceptable to sleep in a booth in the library? Its not finals but I dunno if I can make it back to south. Too drunk.
My dog and I just went outside to pee together.
Randomize
