That's kind of creepy but I guess since I'm wearing your dad's pants nothing is off limits anymore
I am at the point in my high where i now know/understand chinese.
Ever have a poop and think... that has no business coming out of a human? Like it looks like a sick dog's or a ferral animal's?
No no I got the black eyes when I tried to do a flip off the second deck of a pontoon boat. Actually when I did a flip, it was a success.
high enough to want to lick peanut butter off of Michael Buble's vocal chords as he serenades me.
These pissing matches have to stop. They led to last night's scotch through the nose shots. I'll never smell again.
No more going to class sober.. Tried it for a day or two, its just not for me
The last time I've felt a woman's touch, the twin towers were compromised. You can wait like one week
YOU BETTER NOT BE SHAVING YOUR LEGS RIGHT NOW IM TRYING TO HELP YOU
Hungover playing piano at a baptism I am the PICTURE of class I feel like I should be struck by lightning
Her son walked in on us and asked if he could "wrestle too."
We had sex and I never took my mets hat off... I feel like Duda knows and approves.
Do you think you can chase a shot with chicken soup?
Well I just took a pregnancy test... So how's your thanksgiving?
I'm listening to a women in metal station and wearing a flannel. I may have approached peak lesbian.
Randomize
