That was a long time ago. She needed the money.
Every night before bed, when I used to say prayers, now I just think to myself 'freshman sluts. Soon'
We had sex on my friends waterbed ..after that the whole school kept asking him if he had fun getting "sea-sick" last night.
I don't understand why everytime I fuck his bestfriend he seems more interested in me...
Why did I think it was so necessary to steal that rolling pin?
After throwing up, the toothpaste tasted so good. Thank you for not letting me eat it.
hey you forgot your wet suit in my room you can come grab it whenever
Its like every time I go out with you, it always involves Serbian chicks and taco bell and you always manage to get both all over my bed.
Everyone knows relationships are a winter sport
Ummm Im the uneducated alcoholic of the group... if I say its a bad idea, its probably a bad idea.
we've had our differences but let's set them aside, go home and fuck
He held the kayak still so I wouldn't tip over while projectile vomiting. If that ain't true love, I don't know what is...
last night we were hooking up when all the sudden he just murmured "mm blonde". i don't know what to think about this situation.
so then the cop took one last hit off our blunt and then drove off in his car and we just all stood there thinking, yea... that just happened...
My roommate just woke up to me masturbating in our room. I figured this would happen eventually.
Randomize
