I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
that speech was about as successful as her performance in twilight
i just used a urinal to avoid climbing stairs, i need to quit drinking.
I wish I was that guy from the miller light commercials so I could walk into parties and take peoples beer without getting yelled at
my mom used to put diet coke in my bottle. i can pretty much handle anything.
apparently I kept yelling at her that I wanted t-Rex sized lines. awesome
All I saw was a beagle come across the screen and explain the theory of relativity to me and leave
The drugstore has summer clearance. I bought you a little mermaid bucket. Now your hangovers will feel more like childhood adventures.
Lesson of the night- sweaty dick can get stuck to ice, and require medical attention.
I feel that shower jager is exactly what this man needs after last night.
You're a disgrace to gay men everywhere.
also, made a drinking game out of my birthday photos....drink everytime alcohol is in a photo. going through all 350 of them.
You know you are 86'd from the legacy right? You can't down shots then spike the shot glass
Blacked out and showed everyone my nudes. They toasted to my nudes, and I got an outstanding ovation.
I wish I had a tail.
Why?
...why not?
He called my IUD an IED, and said that’s why I had bomb pussy.... I didn’t correct him
Randomize
