WOAH SHIT! That wasn't my girlfriend last night.
almost just walked around my whole building with my bowl in my hand before i remembered 420 isnt a get out of jail free card
Apparently I climbed into a dryer last night and refused to leave... There are pictures to prove it
the kid next to me in training is drinking sangria. its 9am here in case you couldnt calculate. its going to be a good year.
Ok. So I've woke up in a hospital. New thing to top that.... Waking up and realizing you've been locked inside the bar by urself at 430 am and all the doors are locked by key
He came into your room last night to tell me he was leaving, when I woke up this morning he was facedown in your hallway. He didn't make it very far.
At one point he was so drunk he was carrying around a bottle of patron drinking out of it and falling everywhere and every time he spilled it he would scream "THERE GOES TWENTY DOLLARS."
I don't know. Something about answering "what did you do on Sunday?" Seems odd when the reply is, painted, went to the grocery store, put a restraint device on my bed.
The George Foreman grill is melted. I don't know what other problems could arise.
Note to self: Never spend $8 on a liter of rum again
I just remember yelling "BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS" while I was streaking
conclusion from last night: i should wear boob glitter more often
Well you know I have tits so that's half the battle
He is completely naked, curled in a ball, and rocking back and forth in the shower humming lullabies to himself. This is your responsibility since I'm going to be fucking someone in 5.7 seconds.
I think I'm more excited for Santa to come now that I made a drinking game out of it
Randomize
