No more parties with babies... I can't do that again.
I'm timing the release of my poops to the sound of the machine gun from the video game he's playing in the living room.
you said "tonight pinky, we take over the world" and then came in my face
Check that he is NOT ok. He just heated up SoCo and used it as syrup on his pancakes.
it's like doing a sit-up... but, you're inside someone
She gives pretty bad head, but when it's in her dad's Lexus SUV it's tough to complain.
I just saw the Mona Lisa in the background of a porno. Whole new appreciation for art. fuck you I'm cultured.
Inquiring minds want to know if your Bf is circumcised
It's kind of like, standing in a garage and pretending you're a car. Except you're naked.
How do I discreetly dispose of sex toy packaging that is recyclable? What to do...what to do?
Oh and an honorable mention for your father's porn collection. Things I'll never forget.
I don't know if I want to fuck him or punch him in the face.
If you're wondering about the mess, we had sex in the kitchen. There was noodles involved.
I am available for nakedness
But if you do poop yourself let me know. I want that as a tagline. "So funny she'll make you shit yourself."
Randomize
