your butthole totally puckers for the ginge
Will you still be my friend if I read and enjoyed Twilight?
No
This row in front of you is like duck, duck, goose - but eating disorder, eating disorder, failed eating disorder
just took a sink shower in Arbys bathroom
he thought i was a dude.
when I woke up the last searched thing on my phone was "how to make a fireproof dress" I need to stop drinking.
Piggyback rides are my preferred mode of transportation.
You're the 8th person from last night to text me this morning and ask if I'm ok.
What's standard gratutity for someone having a miscarriage on stage at a strip club? It's important.
Well you just missed the ten chi o pledges singing la bamba at our doorstep.
I got to my internship late... with a bag of chipotle and sex hair.
Considering we almost incited a riot on behalf of LGBT rights I have to say that was the best time for our moral compass to turn south.
Charging my vibrator at work. Pray to god I don't forget it!!!
I really need to get to the point where I can poop at his house. I’ve taken three shits on the way home already.
Imma make him fuck me with my jersey on tonight while I chant Go Jets Go. Gotta love playoff hockey szn.
Randomize
