yeah. you were just sitting there watching transformers, caressing your toaster.
im using old socks as coasters. im going to make a great housewife.
Don't feel too badly. Until twenty minutes ago my paper was a heading and a pizza order.
he thought he was parachuting out of a plane... talk about a bad trip.
I remember tearing his shower curtain down but I don't remember trying to shave my vag...
yep. it's official. for $40 they will let you lick the stripper pole.
My uncrustable is thawing in my straightener
hand shaped bruises on both boobs again....i wish i could say this is the first time.
The next time i black out make sure i remove the ping pong balls from my weave. Especially before my first day of classes.
Called my dealer in tears and we talked for an hour until I felt better. That's the way it should be.
Jailed a totally belligerent hot guy. That was probably my most thorough pat down. Ever.
They got mad when I cut the pizza with an x-acto knife. Oh well, more for me then.
I don't need to marry the guy. I just need some filthy, shameful wish fulfillment sex and then live out the rest of my life on the bean farm.
Why does your place smell like gin and misery?
I prefer to think of it as 'ode to single life'
Is it good porn? Or is it more of that fucked up Cabbage Patch Doll porn you made us watch
Randomize