If i come over, it means nothing
everytime he calls himself the maxipad master i can't help but wonder what costume that would involve.
unlike you, ive never imagined darth vader masturbating
She was our DD the least I could do is have sex with her. Even when drunk I'm still chivalrous.
My picture of a beer can in a McDonalds cup full of ice got more likes than my relationship with her. Is beer THAT much better than monogamy?
Bible prof is the guy I made out with at the gay bar on the fourth. He doesn't remember.
Hey when you wake up and read this, we really need to stop pullin our dicks out when we drink dude. I have all the pics, yall are assholes
Good because ass is like 60% of my diet now
Just saw a dude walk out of the parking. Garage in a diaper and tutu. He had a handle in one hand and a toy bow in the other
LOL its 11 am
I was hammered helping a pregnant woman at the gas station name her unborn child. We had to try everything with two different last names because she was waiting on the results of her paternity test.
It was like 10 tiny penises being shoved in my vagina.
Nothing says hey I wanna be your friend again like ambushing me with a dick pic
My boobs are hoarders, they steal food and hide it. Greedy bitches.
Turns out I tore my ACL when I fell off the mechanical bull.. Happy bday to me
She gave me a collar. When I asked what this was for she replied "I'm taming your dick"
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