Hello, balls-out mistake. It's been a while.
I think someone spiked my drink last night. .. Like all 20 of them.
So my mouth tastes like dick. Does that explain how our talk went?
no, its his 'welcome back from rehab' party.
theres always time to masturbate. my grandpa taught me that.
She agreed that we could have sex whenever I wanted and I could let someone else meet my mom.
He said something pertaining to Ragu and vodka I'm worried
He put used condom on the handle of the plunger in the bathroom.
The only requirement is that his name is Kevin... All other factors don't matter to drunk me. Drunk me likey Kevins.
I'm just sayin' man be careful, that chick has castration written all over her.
did you know that my friend knows a guy with 3 balls what the actual fuck
you said "it's karaoke night" and tried to use my dick as a microphone
Is it customary to send a 'thank you card'to someone who gave you awesome oral as a gift at your housewarming party?
He was simultaneously rubbing my shoulders and fucking me. I'm keeping him.
Omg the sex was so good my ears popped. Thank god too. Cause then I didn't have to hear him going on and on about his dumbass feelings. It's called a booty call bitch.
Randomize
