THE PICTURE OF PEPPERMINT MOCHA MADE ME WANT TO TOUCH MYSELF
Girl in my class with fire painted on her face. I. need. that. weed.
Vodka @ 9pm. Library. Nothing can go wrong, I promise.
He came in both my eyes, then refused to give me a towel unless I found him by playing Marco Polo
somedays, I wish the drugs you give me would convince me they were a bad idea preingestion.
where's the fun in that?
We were dancing and she was clawing my stomach like a fat kid getting to a half broken pinata.
I was just handed a bible on my walk of shame....are you there god? its tequila tuesday's hangover
Yo plow her in the living room were all outside tommy wants to see
Did you get an erection too during Paul Ryan's speech?
She started telling me about this odd patch of smooth skin under her boobs. Not sure if she was hitting on me or looking for free advise from a doctor...
I mean, I still played with her tits for like 20min tho.
I pulled a muscle last night drunk dirty snapchatting him
We can stop fighting if you send me a picture of your dick standing at full attention wearing a sock.
I'll wait.
It can also be a hat.
I tried to text you about going to the Lion's Den but sent it to my boss. She was down for it. Please advise.
It's not even a normal fucking affair I've found myself in. It's a fucking bdsm clusterfuck.
Come home... I’m drinking and playing with knives
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