how can u be prego again
i now know from two sources i am better at making out and giving head than she is. and not by a little either.
Either I get my picture taken sitting on a fuckin pony, or I'm not coming.
We named our saturday intramural dodgeball team "we're hungover". Pretty much just an excuse to fuel my alcoholism on friday nights.
He keeps asking where i got my clothes and accessories. i'm not sure if he wants to fuck me, or go shopping.
some guy just asked me if water gets in a vag when girls take a bath. WTF. it's not a wind tunnel!
no seriously he was fingering me like he was really really frantically looking for a song on his iPod.
I really wish you were half the slut you're sister was in college
you say it like running around in your thong wasted is a bad thing
At the party. I feel like I just walked into a lifesize blunt.
i made this one couple from ohio so uncomfortable that they left....and that was WHEN I HAD PANTS ON
She is so graceful and lady-like, like a swan... On meth
I'm having shoppers remorse over a dildo
Hypothetical question: Would it be wrong to tell the annoying children who don't listen to their parents that the motel is haunted?
why yes, bad decisions will be made starting at 3PM Thurs through 8PM on Sun. You have been warned. Plan accordingly.
Randomize
