alright got my week's quota of sex in, ready for modern warfare 2
Yeah go get her. And don't bring her clothes I want her to walk back in her Christmas stocking dress. Take pictures.
You skyped me last night to show me the girl passed out on your bed.
She called him at 5 AM so that he'd be ready for her birthday breakfast and drinks at 6. This is why people don't need to wait until their 21st to have their first drink.
Those two lesbians inspired me. A whole new way to roll. Fuck shots. Gallons of vodka is the new tequila.
I found his Linkedin the day after he created it. Too stalkerish or just right?
Apparently "dick me" was not the response he was looking for.
3-9 out of 10... Depends on the situation. Taco Bell is more of an idea than a restaurant.
How stoned are you?
Also, we found a geriatric Snoop Lion.
Adulthood is making your own puke bucket.
It will be too late. I will have fornicated with the enemy by then.
I'm really sorry I hooked up with your student on the dance floor..
I decided we werent gonna go for round 5 when he started trying to have a serious conversation about how blessed he is to have such a nice penis
He has a point, the man's penis is a legend.
....I just did my boss
I love you. And I will hold your hand as we skip on the road to hell.
I'm really busy with my period
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