i just saw a foot job.
porn is incredible...
I really want to fuck my wifes sister.
Happy hour is for amateurs. Been drunk since 1230. Fell asleep in a disney viewing of UP. Went to the roosevelt and drank more. Now im stumbling around the grove.
I thought smoking would make her look better, but all it did was enlighten me to her snaggletooth
Sounds like a blessing in disguise
I shaved my pubes to make my cock look like it has a lions mane. to surprise the girl that works at the zoo when she comes over.
he just put it in my mouth and said "go"
It is obvious to me now why clam chowder & beer aren't a good combo.
The answer to your question is yes. I am wearing a star of david to the bar in order attract a jewish man.
I miss vodka workout Fridays
That gas station is used for only two things, picking up moonshine and getting murdered. Only two outcomes.
I'm not sure I can continue to condone our having sex in all of your friends' beds
I don't understand why you aren't on this trip all I do is smoke weed drink beer and get fingered
I think we might have a drinking problem when the ASU kids called us crazy
No one made them take a shot with us at the 12 hour mark. That's their bad
ok NEVER tell the strippers its your birthday. i think i have to burn these clothes and take a bath in bleach
If I die at work, I want you to have my mustache collection
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