Definitely just blazed with the housekeeper. That woman needs a raise
you were sitting on the floor eating oats. how should i react?
when i tried to put the condom on he started screaming about how he didn't want his groceries bagged
No, i went to get it done but the guy couldnt find it. exhibit A of why i wanted a clit piercing in the first place.
I'm not sure, 7-8, the last bit was a rush of at least three blended together. Basically you fucked me so stupid that I can't even recall the number of orgasms.
So you know, I'm making that my facebook status.
put me on a leash or i'm going to fuck someone
I walked in and all four of you were covering your heads under the blanket singing waterslides in unison.
She was grinding on him and then she was eating a Big Mac. Who the hell brings a Big Mac to the club?
Just made a floating bacon boat for the hot tub. This is what America is all about.
You can't give me tequila around boys who have girlfriends. That ain't new.
Nothing warms my heart more than the sight of a naked hockey player in my bed.
Yeah but him not going to be sleeping in your sink this time.
i was so high when i left this morning that rather than make sandwiches i threw bread and peanut butter in my backpack. a whole loaf. and a whole jar
after last night, ive never not wanted to live so much in my life.
I just convinced a telemarketer I live in a tree.
What did he say?
He still asked if I want a home security system.
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